


I'm Here

by xenonni



Category: Senki Zesshou Symphogear
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, One Shot, Romance, Yuri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:08:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23540605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xenonni/pseuds/xenonni
Summary: Kirika has a bad dream, and Shirabe comforts her when she wakes.
Relationships: Akatsuki Kirika/Tsukuyomi Shirabe
Kudos: 29





	I'm Here

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers for the end of G!

Kirika felt around in the darkness. For something, she wasn’t quite sure. It was urgent she find it, and quickly. Nothing good came from waiting in this place.

She stumbled forward, groping blindly ahead of her. The sense of urgency swelled as she heard the _woosh_ of something moving in the space behind her, followed by a chill wake that blew across her. She moved forward, quicker now, but still just as blind.

 _Woosh._ This time the draft came from her left side, and the winds buffeted her a bit longer and stronger than before. She turned instinctively towards it, but there was still nothing to see there. She hesitated only a moment before turning back the way she had been going... Which way had she been going?

 _Woosh._ The blast of air was directly in front of her this time, threatening to knock her off her balance. She had to stop her pace for a moment to keep herself from being blown away as the gust grew to an intensity outstripping all that had come before. The wind slowly died down as a light appeared ahead of her. The beam extended inexplicably from somewhere distant above, highlighting a lone pair of figures suspended in motion, as if frozen in time.

Shirabe, tackling Kirika out of the way. As if defending her from something. As if pushing her away from something behind...

There, gleaming in the darkness above and behind Shirabe slowly emerged the tip of an emerald blade that curved sinisterly away into obscurity. As soon as Kirika recognized it, she knew she was too late.

“No...” She whispered to herself. She started forward, but the distance between her and the two figures stretched as she did, making her efforts useless as the blade crept into the light, inch after excruciating inch.

Like a frayed rope stretched taut the moment _snapped_ as the blade flung itself out of the dark. Heading straight for Kirika. Heading straight for Shirabe.

“NO!”

Kirika bolted upright in the dark, panting, adrenaline flooding her system. The thudding of her heart did nothing to melt the block of ice in her chest. She reached forward into the dark, looking for a way to stop it from happening when she felt a gentle hand on her arm.

“Kiri-chan. I’m here.” Shirabe said. Kirika turned towards her, eyes adjusting to the dark that wasn’t quite as complete as she had initially feared. Traces of light from the streets below peeked in around the edge of the drawn curtains. The pinprick glow of the LED alarm clock on the nightstand near the bunk bed. The gleam of Shirabe’s eyes in the darkness.

“Was it the same dream?” Shirabe asked softly. She never called it a ‘nightmare’ even though that’s exactly what it was to Kirika. The fear of losing Shirabe in that moment, every time, and always it was her own fault. The feel of Shirabe jolting in her arms as Igalima impaled her from behind before going limp. The sight of her blood spilled across the ground. The--

“Kiri. Hey.” Shirabe shook Kirika slightly, pulling her back to the present. Kirika didn’t know what to say.

“Mm...” she nodded, tears already welling in her eyes.

“It’s okay, Kiri. I’m right here.” Even in the dark, Kirika could feel the intensity of Shirabe’s stare. Feel the weight she put into those words. Not just ‘here’, physically, but here, in the present. In this moment. Not trapped in an unending nightmare reaching out of the past to drag her back again and again. Kirika felt a desire to lean into Shirabe and embrace her, but the memories of the past shadowed even that for her. She knew it was irrational. There was no Igalima here, no Finé threatening to erase her or Shirabe, none of the things that had made that cruel world where she had to turn on the one she loved. But feeling Shirabe in her embrace had haunted her ever since that day.

Shirabe moved her hand down to grasp Kirika’s instead. She knew. How could she not? How could she not see the way that Kirika always shied away from Shirabe’s embrace lately, the way that she froze with a sickening mixture of anticipation and approbation on her face, the way she woke up screaming in the night for nearly killing her best friend?

How could she still love me, after all of that? The question that always lay at the bottom of the well resurged once again, threatening to overwhelm Kirika as it had so many times before.

How, after all I’ve done to her, after how I turned against her, said all those awful things to her, tried to drive her away from me... after I nearly killed her. How could she still love me?

Kirika felt her pulse quickening again, and this time adrenaline had nothing to do with it. The palpitations sent a small shockwave of fear through her ever beat, slowly turning her veins to ice. There’s no way, right? No way she could keep on loving me after all that. It has to be a lie. I have to get away from her, I have to protect her from myself. I can’t let her be hurt again, I can’t--

Shirabe squeezed Kirika’s hand lightly. A gentle reminder that she was there. No, that she was here. In this moment. With her.

That despite it all, she was still here.

Tears spilling down her cheeks, Kirika leaned into Shirabe. Parts of her brain lit up as she closed the space between them, flashing like the scythe’s blade in the darkness of her dreams. But she didn’t pull to close, instead wrapping her arm around Shirabe’s. This was the best she could do since that day. It hurt to not be able to hug Shirabe. But it hurt so much more to hug her and remember. At least for now, this would have to do.

Kirika sobbed quietly into Shirabe’s shoulder. Shirabe understood. Somehow, despite it all, despite all the voices in Kirika’s head that tormented her and threatened to drown her, despite not being able to even hug her own girlfriend properly, Shirabe understood. And she let Kirika cry there with her in the darkness, morning still hours away, having woken from an awful nightmare. Shirabe gently ran her hand through Kirika’s hair after a moment, careful not to pull her too close.

“I’m here, Kiri-chan.”

“But I... but... how can you still-still love me?” Kirika managed between sobs. “After all I did to you...”

“Of course I still love you. You’re my Kiri-chan. And I’ll keep on loving you, as long as you’re here with me.”

“I’m... I’m sorry...” Kirika voiced, barely above a whisper now that the sobs had subsided.

Shirabe just shook her head. “I’ve told you, there’s nothing to be sorry for. You were fighting for what you believed in, just as I was. And in the end I was able to reach you. I was able to save you, just as you were able to save me.”

“But-”

“I forgive you, Kiri. And I love you.”

Kirika pulled herself a little closer, not trusting herself to form any words as Shirabe continued to gently stroke her hair in the darkness.

“I’m here. And so are you. And that’s all that matters to me.”


End file.
